Monday, July 30, 2012


- remorseless -

Hye. It's been a while. nearly half a year maybe?
So, I've been away for some reason.
Well, I met a new way of life, new kind of community and yeah new environment.
It affects me as much if I would say.
I'm not that active on facebook anymore, but hey,
I will be blogging again from now. So yeah..

So, mother sent me to Politeknik Ibrahim Sultan in Johor.
the Hostel bores the hell out of me.

and shit. my blog's gettin' bored. .__.
I'll update later when my emotions is not stable.

SO YEAH, baru perasan, that I did not update my blog coz i have a very very stable emotions
for half a year. now, thats wicked for me lah. so yeah,
the PnP starts now, the pressure has begun. xD


Tuesday, April 24, 2012


- remorseless -
credit goes to-uze osbourne/PixelDixelArt

we're gonna show all of them what are we going to be. 
we're going to be success, respected.

I'm sick of some people who talk bad things about us.
this is not a game for we will give it all, make them see that we are dead serious about this.
well, this is the true color of people who live in this music scenes.
there's no good and bad. 
we only focus in one. we gather in one.

ph by the way this is a song composed by me, danish and nasir. -for fun- part of this band's material. (although not official)
instrumental :3

but the real deal you can see it on youtube or go to facebook and type in The Derp Goes Rawr :)

Catching winds.

- remorseless -

As far as I concerned, there's no possible way to catch wind.
It'll come by itself, softly touches our naked body, passing through every pores, 
and disappear whenever it wants. Come and go as it pleases.
When the blue sky breezes, I feel like I am not alone. I feel like I am home.
I want it to stay, but I cant find any way.
I am frustrated.
I plant the seeds, I tend it, I water it. but instead of what I imagined,
Thorns are the results.
These thorns inside me, grew bigger and I don't know how to cease it.
To make it less painful. To make it grow into beautiful intricate roses.
Anxiety took over my mind, I'm afraid that I'll be abandoned someday by someone who means a lot to me.
I already am. been abandoned,neglected. I can't sleep for days coz of it.
Those happy moments is only for awhile.

If moment of clarity arrives,
Please, light a shine bright upon me, let me see, let me know, let me understand,
Teach me how to walk in this world full of hypocrisy and madness.
For I am in haze, I am blinded bt lust and gluttony. sunken in this hole for too long,
I've befriended with these menacing cloudy sky.
I am a disgrace. I am a child born of curse.


it's not my intention to make everyone sees me smiling, no it's not.
it's not that I fake it..
I just never been in any comfort to tell people what is my real feelings are.
it's complicated to tell. just let it be oblivion like ashes..

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Nike dunk high

- remorseless -

baby. dont leave me. macam abang mu si 6.0 tuh, haktui pi ilang dlm bas buat gapo

Friday, January 27, 2012

hehe my new baby Eli i love youu

- remorseless -

hye.. this is my new boyfriend..
cousin dia Ellis mid vans dah masuk dalam kotak..sian dia..
takpe, Poppy, jasamu dikenang :) setahun bersamamu..

esok nak bawak Eli jalan2 for the first time, titik pertama beliau berhijrah adalah ke Rumah Api, Ampang.

kita akan menikmati masa agung bersama <3


- remorseless -

coz it's easier for me to contact all my friends coz seems like all of em pakai BB now.
FUCK YOU HALV! bila nak bagi duit gua balik pun taktau,
doh, it's 650rm kot. and it was my birthday present :(

-Nike 6.0
-Macbeth Mcqueen and Newman or Pendleton.
mann.. i dont know.. but I have this thing with sneakers..I love them too much,
there's no way I would spend my money on heels. -___- sakit kaki je.
but who knows.. one day.. my heart will be delighted to accept the visionary of a whole new world.
world of feminine. HOMAIGAD xD

Mcqueen.. pretty simple but yet, is very easy to wear.

you'll be mine Pendleton baby. one day for sure!
This my friends, is 6.0.. might consider between the blue or the red one.

Insyallah, if I work hard to get all the money, with my own titik peluhs, it will be all much worthy.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012


- remorseless -

-this post is too long by the way-

I know it has already been a few days we're in this "2012" but it is never too late to update right?
Because it is still January! :P which is for me, a complete new start.
I'm 18 now, well.. not exactly 18 ..only 17 years and 2 months old. Okay2.. I dont want to exaggerate more about my age, it will become a long post to read.

I learned so many things this past years..
I learned that, we can't easily believe with what people say..Even if they were one of your friends. Enemy exists among friends.
I learned that, education is very important for our future.
I learned that, love.. is a thing that some people could cope with it leavings, but somehow, some people couldn't. It will eventually comes when it is the right time. We can't force it. It is be a nightmare if we tried it so hard.
I learned that, no matter how hard is your life is, you must remember, that there is always, ALWAYS some other people who suffers more than us.
I learned that, luxuries, is only for awhile. When you have fat ass pocket, they will come to you. But when you don't.. they will disappear slowly. its life.
I learned that, family, is all we had in mind, even at the lowest point of your life, family comes first.
I learned so many things.

Truth to be told, I quite miss my High School life.. I thought that after SPM is finished, I will go and live all by myself, I mean.. it's a new thing to do right? not to depend on your family for once. At least before I "enjoy" the new ambiance in University or College.

But, according to my brother, i'm still young and should've just stay at home.
Well, you wanna know my routine at home every effin' day?
sleep at 7a.m.
wake up at 1 or 2p.m
Accompany my nieces to sleep at 3 or 4 p.m well, you know, I SLEEP TOO. until 5.30p.m
and then I will go to gym at 8 till 10.
Then I will watch Merlin till 6a.m or facebook. or tumblr.or twitter or youtube.
He allows me to work, but insist that I must actually stay at home if I want to work.
hellooo, pendalaman gila kott bas pun 1 jam sekali.
I can't fucking wait to get my car licence. Then, all will be alright I guess.
after thinking for quite a while and to put my feelings at ease, I made up with this idea that my brother actually cares for me and didn't want anything bad happens to me.
It's okay brother, my anger is only for awhile, and I love you too :) *i can't be mad at a person really long*
besides, he's still my brother.

I welcomed 2012 at Langkawi with ma homies : Eykram, Yumi, Nafiss, Ambia, Rath (I REALLY MISS HIM!) , kak fika, Dayat and other new friends.
It was really really really super awesomely fuuuuuuunn!
We did so many things, Banana boat, island hoping, jalan2, makan2 and all.
Eykram introduced me with lobsters, it was my first time to eat that thing. Never had a chance before LOL.
it was super nyummeyh!

and the Banana boat, i tell you its WICKED in a good way, at first im scared to ride that thing coz it keeps bouncing and bouncing and eventually you will fall. yes we fell, for a few times. but it was super fun!
and then, the next day, we went to Island Hoping. we went to Dayang Bunting, we saw the Eagles there.
(woi macam jakun giler je nak cerita semua) haha well, I suggest YOU to go there if you're freee. It is really worth for your money.
We stayed there for 4 nights and 3 days. How awesome it would be if I can repeat those moments again. Feels like I dont want to leave that place. hehe.